Obstacles

Up to my age, I have got through a lot. And I am supposed to understand a lot. To some extent, I do. But due to my condition, I am nothing compared to other elite. I am from grassroot. I am an ordinary dog.

I am not lucky because of my family education. This may not be fair to parents. They tried their best to bring me up. But this is the reality. I am not here criticize my parents. I want to show something that hidden in my life.

Regarding the hidden elements, it is so-called fate? Well, if it is hidden how am I supposed to find it? Or what kind of clues enable me to feel them?

Recently I have been through some emotions. Well anxiety is like any parts of my body , accompanying me everyday. Additionally depressed, pressure, even depair. What was the cause? I hope you will never meet it. It is not from me. It is the external environment.

When I was little, I was silly. Just have no idea of so many thins. Things changed when I started to learn things. Every new thing, new mind I aquired would affect me more or less. Well I have to admit that all the things I learned in my eary age before college touched me less than the learnings I got after my graduate. Why? I learned much more than knowledge that in text book. I learned the tricks, fait talks, silly skills in people’s communications, ridiculouse lies.

No matter how fancy you learnd in school, you would always get setback when the reality comes to you. Pity me. But why not did something? I did, really. And here I am. I am at a place I was thinking. I stopped after that change. Because I think I made it and it was enough. But No, definitely no which I realized now. Too late? I am not sure. Theoritically, no. But I would have to pay something to change again.

As I said there are some hidden things which would always stop me. But you never know its existence until it is in our way. Or even when you get away from it, you can see it. Each time it is a transfomation. I say so because everytime I can find new domain which amazes me. But what is the target? What is the obstacles? You know it? I know it. I hope you know it too.